It’s Just Not Right

August 4, 2011 · by Sonnie · Ask Sonnie

Update 8/5/11: A case of Cyber Harassment not Cyber Bullying

Update: Statement from Christopher Lao [according to :

http://www.facebook.com/notes/marlon-cornelio/official-statement-from-christopher-lao/10150263662408468 ]

4 August 2011

The past few days have been very disheartening for me and my family. As you know I have been a subject of a viral video that showed my helplessness during a trying moment. As it stands right now, I have several hate pages in Facebook and Twitter with hurtful and derogatory messages attacking my person. The reputation that I built the past years has been besmirched. A bad day has now turned into wounded feelings and sleepless nights for me and my family.

I have been silent the past few days as I want this to go away soon but not before saying sorry and thank you to people who matter.

I would like to apologize for my behavior that was seen on nationwide television and now on the internet. It was unfortunate that I was caught on camera immediately after an overwhelmingly stressful mishap.

I would like to again sincerely thank those who braved the flood to help a distraught stranger like me. Their selfless act reminded me of how dependable Filipinos are in times of crisis.

Lastly, I would like to thank my family, friends and all of those who showed empathy, consideration and support throughout these trying times. You have given me strength and courage to rise above and be a better person.

Sincerely yours,

Christopher Lao

image courtesy of civilcivilservant.com

Christopher Lao, if that is his name, just discovered the power of social web the painful way.

He is trending in twitter, a Facebook page was set up to highlight his folly, he is also the talk in Google +.

If you’re wondering who he is, he figured out in a news report of a local network- His failed effort to cross his car in a flooded area that caused it to float, and the subsequent interview of him.

I agree, he appeared arrogant and blames everyone for his wrong judgement. But hey, the guy just made a bad call. If that happened to any human being, the immediate reaction is to find others to blame, that’s human nature.

But it is also not right to gloat over his mistake.

What was captured on the video do not represent who he is, it’s plainly a reaction to a bad judgement call. I do not know the guy, but he needs some space after what had happened. And what he said sans the arrogance, needs alittle pondering too, from the government and other people.

after this incident, do you find a need for a cyber wellness program?

Now, how do we learn from this incident?

If I will be in the situation of Christopher Lao, I will

Be proactive
Ask the people around
Not be arrogant
Not talk to media, neither allow them to capture reactions when at the highest or lowest emotional state.

If I am working for media

I would have omitted the interview from the news report because it highlights human folly, not value adding and do not represent threat to life , property and national security. That’s just my opinion

As “miron”

Recognize that what was captured on cam may not be the exact representation of the person, neither of the entire situation.
As human being, we may have opinion on everything but this does not give us the license to embarrass others with our online activity

The reaction of the online community just proved the low tolerance level against arrogance, and how to use the tool to get back. More than ever, the “think before you click” campaign should be more aggressive and evolve to include media to think before they include footages or interviews that is not a threat to life, property and national security.

Certainly, we cannot prevent ourselves from becoming a victim of our own folly. But we can not be a party to someone else’s misery. A line should be drawn between our freedom to express opinion and ~~insulting another~~ [cyber] harassing and stalking another person [cyber bullying is a term being used if offender and victim are minors]

What are your thoughts on the issue?Православни икони

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17 Responses to “It’s Just Not Right”

The Average Jane August 4, 2011 at 9:27 AM

Bravo Sir Sonnie. Kawawa naman yung tao. It was a bad call and could have happened to anyone.
Regnard Raquedan August 4, 2011 at 10:01 AM

Hello!

I agree, you’re on the wrong side if you’re happy it happened to Christopher Lao.

BUT

Mr. Lao had a severe display of “it’s everyone’s fault but mine” behavior that a lot of people dislike. Had he just admitted that he made a mistake, people would feel more sympathetic towards him.
Sonnie August 4, 2011 at 10:26 AM

the public’s tolerance level to arrogance should be a warning to all. and the challenge for all of us is how to tilt the balance of expressing our opinion and outrage but remain civil.
MiGs August 4, 2011 at 10:37 AM

I Agree with Regnard. If he just said na Hindi niya natantya ang taas ng tubig plus offered the suggestion to put street signs informing motorists that the road is prone to flooding and not passable, hindi na siya masyadong papansinin ng mga may makukulit na utak.
Rodge Bucao August 4, 2011 at 11:43 AM

The context of the situation had made him ripe for ridicule, yes, but does this give us a free pass to lambast and tarnish him online? I don’t think so. I actually wrote something along these lines: [goo.gl/xytsk]
Cristina Estacio August 4, 2011 at 11:45 AM

i feel that in our culture anyone who speaks up is considered arrogant when what that person just did was express his exasperation over an incident. he had the (more) bad luck of being captured as a soundbyte/video, broadcast to a mass audience. it can be misconstrued because not all of us are in that situation, context-wise.

people should be more responsible, though, in their online activity. because unlike a news snippet which is dated on an event, it is more permanent and can be ‘passed on’ by individuals linked to one’s account.
Jess August 4, 2011 at 4:41 PM

Lao did not become the object of ridicule just for crossing the flooded street. He became so because he chose to blame everyone else for his mistake.

He could have gotten the sympathy of many people because of his bad judgement call but because of another bad judgement call he got their ire instead.
noemi August 4, 2011 at 11:04 PM

I agree with you Sonnie. Wonderful article.

Some people have low tolerance for such display of anger etc. We don’t even know how the reporter asked the question. Well I saw…he sounded condescending.

I will never understand Regnard and Migs reaction as much as they won’t understand mine. . I guess I have seen a lot of frustration being caught in a flood…enough to understand the stress of this guy.
mel August 5, 2011 at 4:54 AM

Blame media for irresponsible reporting. They should edit and screen the videos they are going to air. Average minds just pick up what they see on TV and process it the average way. Media pips should know better what to serve average joes who are living boring lives and waiting for something like this to sink their teeth into and kill idle time.
Jess August 5, 2011 at 9:20 AM

How you act, or react, under pressure says a lot about you.
Regnard Raquedan August 5, 2011 at 9:24 AM

@Noemi,

First of all, I’m not in favor of cyberbullying. I was analyzing why, instead of the people being sypathetic to the guy, people dogpiled on him.

My assumption is that a lot of people do not like behavior that Lao displayed in the video, thus the ridicule.

Is it fair? Absolutely not, but you’re talking about human nature at work. I won’t blame people if they don’t feel sympathy towards Lao, but that said, to say bad things about him is just plain wrong.

I’d also like to share my experience with floods: I’ve driven through floods many times (Ondoy, Milenyo, etc.). And I get scared every time.

Every time the vehicle I’m driving goes through the water, I pray that the engine won’t die on me. At the back of my mind, I’m thinking of my contingency plan, especially when I’m with other people in the car.

That’s why I know it’s a big risk to go through a flood and I’d recommend using alternate routes if they are available.

Going through a flood is huge gamble– so how would you feel for a person who gambled, lost all his money and blamed everyone else?
Cristina Estacio August 5, 2011 at 12:11 PM

Christopher Lao already had apologized for his mistake. The creator/s of the FB page should also cancel the accounts.

The message that it is being sent in this whole affair is when someone is in an emergency situation, it is acceptable to poke fun at the misery of others.
Jess August 5, 2011 at 1:04 PM

The message being sent in this whole affair is:

1. be humble enough to accept a fault, people will love you for that
2. do not blame others for your mistake
2. be careful what you say to media
3. be analytical enough to know that no one made fun of someone in an emergency situation.
4. no one poked fun at the misery of others, people made fun of one person because he didn’t do #1.
Sonnie August 5, 2011 at 1:57 PM

Good point @Jess on item #1 above, and I totally agree on “how you act, or react, under pressure says a lot about you”.

But some people went too far, a supposed good laugh became something else.

There appears to be a racial tone on the turn of events, the strong reaction of the public against his folly and arrogance is worth taking note of. It’s either he is Chinese, or because he represents the “powerful and the rich” at that situation, or both.

And the “powerful and rich” one, in the middle of emergency situation, is not even thankful to the small people who pushed his car and choose to blame everyone except himself.

I hope this kind of public reaction is well taken into consideration. I also hope the guy will learn from this unfortunate incident and made him a better lawyer one day.

This incident is a learning experience for all of us, and hopefully make us responsible with our behavior both online and in life situations
Jess August 5, 2011 at 3:30 PM

It is a very common emotion among humans. We think it’s funny when someone slips on a banana peel but it’s a different story when we later see that the person got injured by the fall.

There are those who got pi$$ed off by Mr. Lao’s actions but later felt sorry for him when they later learned that he’s getting the bashing of his life.

Some people did went too far and still continue to do so. These are simply rude people.

Discrimination? Might not be the racial or class type, but more on people expected him to speak wisely especially since he is a UP law student.